Personal

My secret

In this post a lot of people will learn a lot about me. Some might look down on me, some might look up to me. Some might judge me, others might criticise me for airing my business. But I do not care. This is my blog and I shall write what I like. It is my business and I shall post it if I so wish. I know who I am, I know what I can and what I cannot be judged for, and whilst I view this as something that I shouldn’t be judged for, I know that people will judge me for it anyway. I just thought I should clarify that before I continue.

The big ‘secret’ as such is that my father is in prison and has been and shall continue to be for quite some time now. Before this post, only a select few people knew about this. That’s because showcasing the fact that your dad is locked up isn’t exactly the best way to get people to like you, especially when you’ve just moved to university and are trying to make friends.

I’ve announced this enough by now to know exactly what you’re thinking. Some are thinking ‘oh my God remind me to stay away from her’, others are thinking ‘what did he do?’, and the remainder are thinking ‘I didn’t expect that’.

For those thinking that they should stay away from me; before I revealed my ‘secret’ did I give off any signs that you should fear me/look down on me/gossip trash about my personal life that you obviously know nothing about? No.

For those thinking ‘what did he do?’- well, you’ll never know. I’m not here to exploit my father and his mistakes, simply to show you where I came from and what I’ve become and learnt from it.

And for those who weren’t expecting that; thank you. That means that I’ve done my job well. From the get go I’ve set out to be my own person and to denounce any signs that I came from my parents. They are not me and I am not them. I am my own being and I’m glad that I did a good enough job of that to stop anyone suspecting otherwise.

My point is that so many people in my life have said that I am a snob or that I look down my nose at others because my life is seemingly so ‘perfect’. Newsflash, no one has a perfect life, it’s just that others have it slightly better. I am not someone who has had it slightly better. There’s a whole backstory to me that only close family and friends know. The rest of you see what I present. I like to think I present myself in a good manner. I don’t talk about my family, I don’t brag about things. I simply keep myself to myself until I trust a person enough to do otherwise. But right now I’m in a venting mood and I want people to know this about me.

If you ever hear a bit of information about someone and you proceed to gossip and judge without knowing the whole story, then think of this post. Remember how before reading this you probably thought I was ‘normal’ and nice and all that good stuff. I, and many others like me, should not be judged by naive minds on the mistakes of others. Who you come from is not who you are.

Bitchiness is unattractive, honesty is not.

 

Featured image: Moyan Brenn

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