“Women who love themselves are threatening” – Naomi Wolf

This post is for everyone who has ever been called stuck-up, a snob, full of themselves, selfish and you-think-you’re-better-than-everyone-else. That’s probably an awful lot of people, and if you’ve never been called any of those things then either you’re the one calling people out, or, you simply don’t love yourself enough.

I am not afraid to admit that I love myself. I like the way I look, I like the way I act, I like the choices I’ve made, I like my level of intelligence and I like the people I’ve chosen to surround myself with. I know that I am not ugly. I know that I am not fat. I know that lots of people find me attractive. That doesn’t make me stuck-up. I acknowledge that there are people who are much better looking than me and people with much, much better bodies, but that doesn’t mean I’m about to beat myself up about it. Sure, I have plenty of gripes with the way I look; I hate my nose, my eyes are too small, I am flat chested and my arms wobble sometimes. But I am not unattractive, far from it in fact.

I refuse to work myself up and constantly tell myself ‘you’re ugly, you’re not that pretty’ just because if I don’t, someone is going to call me stuck-up and full of myself. Sure, you can go ahead and hate yourself and the way you look, but bringing me down and calling me all sorts of names just makes you look uglier. A person who embraces the way they look and conveys an attitude of confidence and promotes other women to feel good about themselves is much more attractive and sexy than a grumpy, loathsome, hating bitch.

Aside from looks, I really love the choices I’ve made. Going to university to expand my intelligence is the best decision I’ve made in my life. I adore reading, watching factual documentaries and researching into historical topics. I love to learn and I refuse to apologise for making that choice. The amount of times I hear people call students snobby is ridiculous. If getting an education makes you snobby then I guess millions of people must be snobs right? Your doctor? A snob. Your dentist? A snob. Your pet’s vet? A snob. Your teacher? A snob. Your favourite actors? Probably snobs too. Just because people love to learn and have intelligent, intellectual conversations doesn’t mean they think they’re better than you. It just means that that’s what they want to do to achieve what they want in life – everyone has goals and some people need higher education to reach theirs.

On top of all this, I love the person I am. I know I am funny, I know I am bubbly and I know I am outgoing. I know people like to be around me, and that doesn’t make me stuck-up either. It shows that I am a good person whose company people enjoy. I love making people laugh and feel good and I know that I can do both of those things, so I do. If I wasn’t a likeable person I would only have two friends and I would lead a very boring social life. But that’s not me. I have lots of friends which clearly shows I am a friendly person.

The only reason people call you names is if they’re insecure about themselves. If you routinely go out of your way to drag other people down for loving themselves then you are a very ugly, hateful person who will end up very lonely. It takes a lot of hard work to embrace the person that you are and to have the confidence to say ‘do you know what? I look good, I am popular and I am smart’, and when you stop focusing so much hate onto other women and only become concerned with what you’re doing with your own life, then you’ll find self-love comes a lot more easily.

The way I live my life is very simple: I do not care what other people are doing, the only person who matters is me because I have to live with myself the longest, therefore my happiness is paramount. That’s not selfish, it’s very bloody important. If having self-confidence and self-acceptance makes me happy, then you’re damn right I’m going to embrace myself and love myself, and I don’t care what you think of that.


Featured Image: WELStech Podcast (PDD)


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